Sitting with Discomfort

The energy that we have received in this past month, is comparable to the winds that have started off this month of March. In this last month, I personally have received so many personal challenges, and they were indeed designed for me alone. There have been things I needed to slow down for, changes I needed to make to be able to move forward in my endeavors, and even some personal issues that I needed to come to terms with.

However, the energy that was there for me to work with, made it understood that under no certain circumstances could I proceed without doing the work. There was no way forward until I had completed what needed to be done. Things broke, posts wouldn’t go up, deadlines were not met and even getting sick for a short time. These lessons also came hard and fast, one right after the other, not allowing me to ignore them for very long.

I needed to stop and look at why things were not working, what things were broken and preventing me from moving forward, why would those blog posts just not go up without a hitch, what was actually being missed when I couldn’t meet a deadline or what things were not being done when I needed to rest and care for myself instead.

What actually needed to change, was the mindset I was in. We know that we cannot proceed as we always have if change is what we seek. However, sometimes we become stubborn and try to force needed changes and then remain who we always have been. This is not possible. New understandings change us little by little, there is always some loss for who we were and beliefs that we have held on to so dearly and for so long. This is okay, as a matter of fact, if you don’t feel their loss, there may be a chance you don’t actually let them go…and you will indeed receive the lesson again.

Sitting with these discomforts, and being in a place readying yourself to make changes are the lessons. The universe wants you to be successful, find that new path, new opportunities, new ideas, and new ways to create love and joy. Acknowledging pain and discomfort and making choices to not stay there will bring forth the new paths you will walk as spring arrives and we welcome the changes and renewal that it affords us.

Please keep up the hard work, it is doing you so much good and creating the love that is essential for life.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

Stepping Into the New Year

As I sit here strolling, well to be honest running through all off social media, seeing everyone’s new year themes and waiting to see where I am guided...I put the phone down and walk away, for this is not a path to healing.

Outside a dog and a sheep run about as I pick a path to venture through nature. They are at play, doing what makes their hearts and souls happy. They run because it feels good, they stop when they are tired, they eat when they are hungry and seek out each other when in need of companionship.They miss each other when separated, and are joyful when reunited. They give themselves the best of their day, and the best that they can to each other. It’s good to be a dog and a sheep.

I then realize that the answer has already been given in my inability to find one. All of this pushing forward right now is totally counter intuitive to me at this time. This is a time of “hibernation” reflection, and finding our path for this year. It is not something quickly put together in the week in between winter holidays and the first of January. It is done day by day, moment by moment.

Change is what we are seeking at this time of year. Being HONEST about what is working for our highest good and what is a temporary and what must be let go of... What are our obstacles? What do we have for tools? What can we learn? How much love and compassion can we give ourselves before and during these processes? For there will not be change if we cannot give ourselves love or compassion.

Right now in the middle of the holiday season many are focused on giving and not having enough to give, loved ones and ones who are not there, happy memories and horrific moments that defined us. We have managed to externalize and keep ourselves busy to the point of exhaustion.

What makes us think that we can make ourselves anew or at least the perfect plan to for the new year in this state? No, please do not do this to yourself.

Stop, and allow yourself time. Time to enjoy, time to explore what your needs are and time to approach things honestly with yourself. Remember, just like healing, time is cyclical, the months of the year, the phases of the moon, the revolving of the sun. This also means healing and needed changes happen in cycles too. There is no failure in needing additional cycles for healing, you just need more healing at a deeper level.

Let’s take this first step into the new year together. I’m right beside you as you tell yourself “I love you and I will work at a pace that my body can handle. I will work with my mind to speak lovingly to my self. I will find what brings my soul joy.”

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

Holiday Self-Care

Just a few little notes to self this week about keeping things real and for your highest good. This time of year, festive and happy are what comes to mind for many but unfortunately, that is not always realistic. Whether you are with family, friends or just find this time of year difficult to navigate:

1. Self-care comes first! Remember why you are on your healing journey, this will help in the decisions and reactions you make and have while with others.

2. Use past interactions with others as a reference for what you can expect with them this year.

3. Keep your expectations of others realistic. It is the season of goodness and light, but that does not always guarantee a happy, positive attitude with anyone. People are who they are.

4. Know your boundaries, be vocal about them, and keep them. If they are not respected you have the ability to remove yourself from the conversation and/or location.

5. If you find that you are in a place that is harmful or overwhelming to you, your healing, your mental state or are just in continuous discomfort, leave. Have a plan in place beforehand, then you will have this option at your disposal if needed. Pre-planning means you will not have to make decisions about “how” when you will most likely already be overwhelmed. You have the right to protect yourself.

6. Don’t go it alone. Plan to have friends on stand-by or even go with you.

Slow down. Really think through whether or not you want to go where you are invited. Sometimes it just has to do with your energy level. Saying no is okay (even if you’d like to go, remember self-care first!) No is a boundary. A necessary boundary. It is a boundary of self-care. There is a limit to what you allow yourself to give or others to freely take, without taxing or doing harm to yourself.

Lastly, you can always do your own thing! Make new traditions for celebrating during the holiday season. Or choose to do something different entirely.

Please take care of yourself this season, and may blessings be upon you.

Happy Solstice Everyone! Here’s to bringing in the light!

Dr. Nicole